aaron shoots- BANG. you're dead.

Sunday, August 01, 2010

It's almost a year since I update my blog. I got a sudden urge to update my blog. No idea why but just felt like it.

Anyway, I've been slacking for the past 1 year. I need to search for my drive and determination to do things. I'm not exactly lacking of them but rather I lost them, I just need to find them back. It'll not be an easy task. It's been good the past year because I get to understand people that have problems with determination.

I haven't been like the old Aaron Koh for the past year. Kind of got used to it but I'm starting to realize that it's not a very healthy way of doing things. I need to get back on my feet to warm up for the rest of my NS days. I will be getting extremely busy once I'm out of this hellish place. NS isn't really hellish but I just don't like the place where there are lots of screw up people. There are a lot of first times in my army camp in a very negative sight.

Time to keep myself occupied with things that are worth my time and things that I love. Goodbye lazy! Hello proactive!

Food for thought.
During my NS days, my life slowed down but people around me zoom-ed past me. I question myself, is it right to slow down for this 2 years? Is it okay? Initially I thought it was alright. I finally got to slow down in this 2 years. But in recent weeks, I've been talked to and I thought that it's not myself to slow down. I need to warm up now!

But I got scolded for slowing down. Why? Must I be so proactive all the time. I got no obligation for anything. But I'm told to be proactive. I don't know. I slowed down like finally! But I can't do that? I really don't understand some things. Is it because of people's expectations? Or is it because it's not good to slow down at all? People are weird. No rather, there are so many things to consider. We need to consider how would this guy or girl think? If I said she is pretty, would she like me? Or would she think that I just have a glib tongue?

There's always two sides to everything. Life is difficult. How should I be in order to make everything easier? Do I just convince myself that hey! Everything's going to be fine don't worry. Just because humans can self psycho themselves? I'm still at it. Thinking of so many possibilities.

Thinking thinking...

10:53 PM